O Come, All Ye Felines....

[lagilman]

still in rough draft. Feel free to help out. :-)


O Come All Ye Feline
Purring or petulant
O come ye, O come ye to clip your claws.
Come and be nail-clipped,
For the sake of th'sofa;
O come, let us clip you,
O come, let us clip you,
O come, let us clip you,
For your own good.

O yowl, sweetest kittens,
Yowl in futile protest,
Yowl so all that hear you know your pain.
Give to me your paw without complaint;
O come, let us clip you,
O come, let us clip you,
O come, let us clip you,
Don’t you dare scratch me!

All Hail! With treats I bribe you,
On this fateful morning,
O felines! for evermore be your claws cut clean.
Household calm, no more flesh be rendering;
O come, let us clip you,
O come, let us clip you,
O come, let us clip you,
Peace is restored.

Comments

[sorek.livejournal.com]

I don't remember if I've asked this before but have you tried those "emery cat" things (As Seen On TV)?

[lagilman]

Nope. My two get thier nails clipped on a regular basis (and take it like loves - as I said to Wrenn below, the song's not amusing if there's no complaint), and then use their scratching box as needed. Well, the scratching box and the old sofa...