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lagilmanI have Great Plans for today. They involve incorporating my betareader's notes on "Praise the Devil" and polishing that off, getting a few thousand words written on PSI#4, putting together my editorial notes for a freelance project, invoicing finished freelance work, paying bills and printing out paperwork for the guvment (apparently I get money back from one hand and owe to the other. which is much the way guvment works, I suspect). Also, replying to pending email, laundry, making another vet appointment for Elder Cat, and ordering groceries.
The main thing, though, is the Great Plan to not actually speak to another human being, and most especially not in any way that requires me to be Up, Cheerful, and Interesting.
(the folks at the vet don't expect me to be any of these things, especially when bringing Elder Cat in again)
See... I am a classic midline introvert. I like people, a lot. I like talking to people. I like listening to people. But interacting exhausts me*. In the course of a normal day, I get to go out, interact for a handful of hours, and then retreat home to recharge (this is why I have cats. They don't ask me to be On, just There). In the course of a convention, on the other hand... the moment I leave my hotel room, I have to be ready to interact at any moment, from the hallway to the elevator to the conference floor, to the meals, etc etc. In person, with enthusiasm and real interest. And I enjoy doing it (I wouldn't be there, otherwise), but over the course of 3-5 days there is a constant drain of energy, like a leaky tub, and eventually, inevitably, I run dry.
And yeah, there is the hotel room to retreat to, but there are also obligations that keep me out of the room. Because I'm there to Interact.
And even when I think I'm home free, I'm not, really - on the shuttle to the airport, normally a time of quiet introspection, I ended up sitting with the winner of the Mr Romance contest (yes, really, RT has such a thing, and it's quite entertaining), and he and I got to talking, as one does, about travel and obligations and exhaustion...yes, I was talking about the costs of performing and related exhaustion while suffering from same and trying to avoid more of same. Very meta, I know.
So. Today, the plan is to interact to as few people as possible, and see no-one in person except maybe my neighbor, who understands that a wave is as good as a conversation, some days.
Tomorrow, I'll think about calling my mom**.
(also: no makeup. I have worn more makeup in the past week than I usually do in a month. All right, that's about one day's worth for many people, but still. I may not even brush my hair.)
*there are some folk who do not drain me, interacting. A friend in the same situation refers to them as not-people, and it is (from me, anyway) a compliment. I couldn't tell you what it is that makes them non-people, only that I know it when I'm around them. If I ever find someone who is a reverse-person, who actually recharges me, I am going to lock them in my basement and keep them forever. Except I don't have a basement. Darn.
**and The Guy. Okay, I already spoke to The Guy and will see him tomorrow. But he wouldn't be The Guy if he wasn't a not-person (see above definition).
The main thing, though, is the Great Plan to not actually speak to another human being, and most especially not in any way that requires me to be Up, Cheerful, and Interesting.
(the folks at the vet don't expect me to be any of these things, especially when bringing Elder Cat in again)
See... I am a classic midline introvert. I like people, a lot. I like talking to people. I like listening to people. But interacting exhausts me*. In the course of a normal day, I get to go out, interact for a handful of hours, and then retreat home to recharge (this is why I have cats. They don't ask me to be On, just There). In the course of a convention, on the other hand... the moment I leave my hotel room, I have to be ready to interact at any moment, from the hallway to the elevator to the conference floor, to the meals, etc etc. In person, with enthusiasm and real interest. And I enjoy doing it (I wouldn't be there, otherwise), but over the course of 3-5 days there is a constant drain of energy, like a leaky tub, and eventually, inevitably, I run dry.
And yeah, there is the hotel room to retreat to, but there are also obligations that keep me out of the room. Because I'm there to Interact.
And even when I think I'm home free, I'm not, really - on the shuttle to the airport, normally a time of quiet introspection, I ended up sitting with the winner of the Mr Romance contest (yes, really, RT has such a thing, and it's quite entertaining), and he and I got to talking, as one does, about travel and obligations and exhaustion...yes, I was talking about the costs of performing and related exhaustion while suffering from same and trying to avoid more of same. Very meta, I know.
So. Today, the plan is to interact to as few people as possible, and see no-one in person except maybe my neighbor, who understands that a wave is as good as a conversation, some days.
Tomorrow, I'll think about calling my mom**.
(also: no makeup. I have worn more makeup in the past week than I usually do in a month. All right, that's about one day's worth for many people, but still. I may not even brush my hair.)
*there are some folk who do not drain me, interacting. A friend in the same situation refers to them as not-people, and it is (from me, anyway) a compliment. I couldn't tell you what it is that makes them non-people, only that I know it when I'm around them. If I ever find someone who is a reverse-person, who actually recharges me, I am going to lock them in my basement and keep them forever. Except I don't have a basement. Darn.
**and The Guy. Okay, I already spoke to The Guy and will see him tomorrow. But he wouldn't be The Guy if he wasn't a not-person (see above definition).
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no subject
Date: 2011-04-11 12:37 pm (UTC)I also have non-people (aka the 'you' of 'I don't want to speak to anyone. No, I don't mean You.') Parents, Trevor and close friends come into this category. I suspect that relationships in which the other person is not a non-person have a limited shelf life. One of my deal breakers has always been people who want to know what one is Thinking.
no subject
Date: 2011-04-11 12:45 pm (UTC)Especially since they're probably not thinking anything in particular, actually, and they'll tell you eventually (as opposed to those who Withhold as a power trip. "You have to guess what is going on." No, I really don't.)
no subject
Date: 2011-04-11 01:37 pm (UTC)No, that really is tedious!
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Date: 2011-04-11 12:37 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-04-11 01:33 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-04-11 01:51 pm (UTC)On the lack of a basement
no subject
Date: 2011-04-11 03:32 pm (UTC)*sigh*
I keep having to explain to friends that, well, yeah, I can be charming and wonderful and the life of the party and totally work a room...but that it takes SO MUCH OUT OF ME that i have to consider what events it's worth doing it for...
The not-people are sort of like cats. You're allowed to just BE around them, and they totally don't care, or drain you.
no subject
Date: 2011-04-12 03:26 pm (UTC)::Fails.::
no subject
Date: 2011-04-12 03:54 pm (UTC)Brain chemistry isn't destiny, but it does prepare you for the drive.
no subject
Date: 2011-04-12 04:11 pm (UTC)I wonder if there's a correlation between dog/cat people and extroversion/introversion.
no subject
Date: 2011-04-12 04:18 pm (UTC)I wonder if there's a correlation between dog/cat people and extroversion/introversion.
Having grown up with/loved both, and known many extroverts who had no use for animals at all (my ex, for'ex), I suspect it's more the -personality- of the animal than the species.
no subject
Date: 2011-04-14 10:11 pm (UTC)