bah, humbug

[lagilman]

All right, yes, I'm a forgetting-to-practice Jew. But I also grew up in the US of Christmas, and therefore I get to have an opinion. Rant ahead. Don't say you weren't warned.
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I am reminded again of one of the really nice things about this neighborhood -- limited holiday decorations, and the ones that do go up tend to be house-appropriate (i.e. Victorian, and/or proportional).

Call me a Grinch and you might not be wrong, but I never understood the need to do BIGGER!BRIGHTER!MORE PLASTIC! decorations. Especially when they totally overwhelm not only the house and yard, but the entire street. Some call them festive. I call them butt-ugly and annoying.

I'm not anti-holiday decorations, mind you. A strand or seven of lights illuminating the night are lovely (just please, don't mix chasing lights with still ones unless you plan it out beforehand!). A wreath of greenery on your door or winding around posts, delightful. A display of a creche or maybe a few reindeer and a Santa, sized approprately to your yard, I will admire and point out to others as lovely expressions of the season. I even admit to a sneaking if guilty fondness for the giant blow-up Frosties and Grinches you see occasionally, although I do wish that people would think about the relative size of the display versus their yard.

(and whatever you do INSIDE your house to decorate is your business)

But the people who festoon every single square inch of house, roof, and yard with blinking, chasing lights, plastic waving Santas, bobble-head reindeer, vinyl-wrapped gifts, and every other piece of crap merchandisers can think to sell? And let's not forget, although I wish I could, the blinking signs that they 'forget' to turn off at a reasonable hour?

I'm coming down your chimney, man. I'm eating your cookies. And I'm leaving fake coal* in your stockings.


*real coal's too expensive to waste on you idiots. I'm giving it to people who aren't wasting so much energy on stupid displays.

Comments

[lauriemann.livejournal.com]

In our neighborhood, large, lit deer are wildly popular. Also those huge blow-up displays that have gotten very popular over the last few years. And surprisingly few people have their lights on timers; they just run them all night long.

I put a few strings of colorful lights up in the front yard on a timer and left it at that.

[smoemeth.livejournal.com]

Kinda makes you wish you lived in a less-nice neighborhood where people are afraid to leave portable things out on their lawn, doesn't it?? ;)

A few years ago, wojsvenwoj bought a strand of those "icicle lights" in a post-Xmas sale. Ever since, he has insisted upon stringing them from our mantel, and setting them on the "seizure-inducing" blink setting.

At least they're not visible through the window. :}

[earthgoat.livejournal.com]

As an atheist who enjoys the gathering aspect of the season but has become soured by the who "BUYMOREBUYNOWBUYFORYOURSECONDCOUSINTWICEREMOVED" and the expectations of everyone that you owe them something, whether it's a gift or a card or even just your precious time (and I'm utterly sincere with that phrase), I'm right there with you, sister. A little bit of Christmas cheer goes a long way and too much, well you deserve the electric bill you're getting next month and then some.

[otterdance.livejournal.com]

LOL! I couldn't agree more. Those huge, overblown displays look especially odd out here with no snow to soften the effect. There's one house down the street that looked really festive and nice, with very nice stringing of red and white lights. But then they kept going. Too many different styles and sizes of lights that all clashed, and inflatable everything.

The people around the corner with the yellow monster truck (and a Papillon!) have an inflatable Santa on a Harley. He's always deflating. Looks like a giant, multicolored used condom thrown on their lawn. Not so festive.

So far we've got a swag on the front door. If we do actually manage to get the lights up, they are always on a timer. One thing i've seen that I really think would be neat and geographically appropriate is a snowman made out of tumbleweeds spray painted white. Nothing says Merry Christmas in SoCal better than a stack of prickly weeds.

[shana.livejournal.com]

At such times, I like rereading the beginning of Charlotte MacLeod's _Rest You Merry_.

[kriz1818.livejournal.com]

They're pretty tame in my neighborhood, but on my drive to Temple there's a place (with a fairly large yard, admittedly) that's turned into one of those "local attractions," the display is so huge.

I wish they'd put the money they're spending on the "spirit of the season" into charitable donations.

[windrose.livejournal.com]

One of the houses down the street from me made the evening news because of all the lights. The entire property is covered in blinding white lights, complete with a horde of white-light deer, Santas, elves, etc. I shudder to think what their electric bill is going to look like.

[fakefrenchie.livejournal.com]

http://www.boston.com/bostonglobe/magazine/articles/2007/12/16/more_power_to_him/


Did you by any chance visit your sister and get a gander at this man's house in Jamaica Plain? Apparently, he's got a love it or detest it kind of house decorating obessision going on.

[mevennen.livejournal.com]

It's crept over this side of the Atlantic, too. There are some truly hideous displays in this village. We don't, personally, put anything on the outside of the house - we have a tree, a wreath, and some interior decorations, plus a lit Xmas tree on the outside of the shops in the High St. That's it and that's going to stay it.

I like seeing the trees in people's windows. Just NOT on their bloody lawn.

[debg.livejournal.com]

Yep.

[safewrite.livejournal.com]

I hate the same things: overdone lighting extravaganzas, seizure-inducing flashing lights, things that do not fit with the home/building or the size or the yard...all of it.

It reminds me of an anti-consumerism song called "American Waltz" by Biff Rose, which goes in part, It's a Santa Claus world, if you will/Of ice cream and candy bars - eat your fill/And marshmallow fatness that's bound to kill/But we love it that way./...

...Yes, we all love to dance our American waltz/ It's our dream come false.

[neutronjockey.livejournal.com]

Any love I had for x-mas lights has been thrown down the tubes. After a week of no running water and electricity--- driving by folks' houses that have power and seeing them proudly displaying their blinking, flickering, colorful lights... *steam*

[burger-eater.livejournal.com]

I have to admit that I secretly like those big crazy displays.

[kateelliott.livejournal.com]

There are three cul-de-sacs around the corner from us with such major displays that people DRIVE THROUGH and walk through the neighborhood especially on weekend evenings to view them. On Saturday nights the weekend around Xmas the people who put up the lights even stand outside and hand out candy. Actually, I think it's kind of sweet.

However, we have two houses on our cul-de-sac now that are pretty decked out. My husband says that if our block starts going over (I hope not), he's going to set up an elaborate scene of the Maccabees fighting Antiochus's troops.

[betheliz.livejournal.com]

On my way to work, I drive by this house everyday that has a ton of those huge blowup things. Personally I don't really like them at all, but I've come to a grudging acceptance of them. However, they have all of them, for every season. I once counted (stuck at a traffic light) 17 of them up for Halloween. And they have more for Christmas. They're huge, and crammed in every nook and corner of their small yard. The house is small enough that I'm not sure where they store all of them (for Xmas, Halloween, Easter, etc). It's the most garish thing I've ever seen.