lagilman: coffee or die (Default)
[personal profile] lagilman
from fellow Luna-tic Robin Owens... (and amended slightly by moi)


How many fantasy characters does it take to change a light bulb?

Epic Fantasy Writer: How many you got?

Traditional Fantasy Writer: One. There can be only one Chosen One.

Quest Fantasy Writer: One, but s/he must form a party of adventurers to retrieve the magic pliers first.

Romantic Fantasy Writer: Two, but they must do it while sharing a passionate kiss.

Erotic Fantasy Writer: Three, but they must do it naked while sharing a passionate kiss.

Dark Fantasy Writer: One, as long as it's done with a tentacle slithering from the bottomless pit.

Urban fantasy writer: Three. A werewolf, a vampire, and a chick in leather with a gun.

Literary Fantasy Writer: One, but it will take me four pages to describe it.

Slipstream Fantasy Writer: Is the light bulb an allegory for birth or death?

SF Writer: Who uses light bulbs? Honestly...

Date: 2007-04-05 06:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] girasole.livejournal.com
I am not having a fun week. This made me laugh. A lot. I would like to post it to several of my discussion groups. May I? And shall I attach your name to it or not?

Date: 2007-04-05 06:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] puppetmaker40.livejournal.com
That's good!

I like the SF capper

Date: 2007-04-05 06:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] neadods.livejournal.com
Urban fantasy writer: Three. A werewolf, a vampire, and a chick in leather with a gun.

BWAhahahahaa!

Sword and Sorcery writer

Date: 2007-04-05 06:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zornhau.livejournal.com
Two; One mighty-thewed swordsman to hack down the unspeakable monstrosities slithering towards them through the darkened chamber, and one scantily-clad former temple dancer to climb the ornately carved walls and strain to reach the light fitting.

Re: Sword and Sorcery writer

Date: 2007-04-05 07:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jamesenge.livejournal.com
Postpost MZB--I think you can have any kind of temple dancer you want.

Kudos to the makers and additors of this list. Light bulb jokes are what civilization is all about.

Re: Sword and Sorcery writer

Date: 2007-04-05 09:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zornhau.livejournal.com
Feminist SF Writer: None! Lightbulbs are a phallocentric masculine construct! My characters are in touch with the Goddess archetype, and thus will use intuition to navigate the nurturing womb of primordial darkness.

Date: 2007-04-05 07:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] eeknight.livejournal.com
Military SF Writer: None. The 30,000 kilowatt targeting spotlamps on the quad-track Indomitable Mk. V do just fine as a light source.

Misogynistic Fantasy Writer: Here on Counter-Earth men do not need such baubles! Besides, deep down, women like it in the dark, you just need to admit it to yourselves.

Steampunk Fantasy Writer: Not our problem. We're still using coal gas because it makes that cool whooshing noise.

Anthropomorphic Fantasy Writer: Don't change it! We'll go all tharn and get run over!

Date: 2007-04-05 07:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tru2myart.livejournal.com
Urban fantasy writer: Three. A werewolf, a vampire, and a chick in leather with a gun.

And somewhere in the world Laurell K. Hamilton's ears started ringing.

hee hee

Date: 2007-04-05 08:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wrathchylde.livejournal.com
Love it!!!

Date: 2007-04-05 08:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] karenmiller.livejournal.com
LOL! Bloody brilliant!

Date: 2007-04-05 10:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] yourbob.livejournal.com
A werewolf, a vampire, and a chick in leather with a gun enter a bar....

Date: 2007-04-05 10:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] music-lover3.livejournal.com
hehe. that was funny. thanks for the laugh!!

Date: 2007-04-06 02:52 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dianora2.livejournal.com
Heeeee. Very funny.

Date: 2007-04-06 03:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] 12stargazers.livejournal.com
Military Fantasy: Just one. But he/she has to earn the right through trial by combat.

Date: 2007-04-06 05:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] equesgal.livejournal.com
Copywriter: Just One! Don't miss YOUR chance to screw in the lightbulb!

Date: 2007-04-07 06:03 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] intentonrapture.livejournal.com
Urban fantasy writer: Three. A werewolf, a vampire, and a chick in leather with a gun.

BWAAHAHAHAHAHAA!!! *slaps knee* thats soo true!!! hahahahaa!!!

*ahem* i really needed that. ;p

Date: 2007-04-07 05:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] allaboutm-e.livejournal.com
This is splendid! ::snicker ::

Date: 2007-04-07 09:37 pm (UTC)
ellenscult: (Default)
From: [personal profile] ellenscult
*heh* Thank you for the amusement! I'm over from [livejournal.com profile] matociquala's blog. I reckon the dark fantasy writer would say "Light? What is this abomination?!"

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lagilman: coffee or die (Default)
Laura Anne Gilman

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