Apr. 16th, 2014

lagilman: coffee or die (meerkat coffee)
Tuesday morning: pick up folks and hit the road - in godsawful rain and wind - to Boston. Unpack, decompress, Seder (lovely as always with the extended family), back up this morning to WTFBBQ there's snow on the ground, unpack the ice from the windshield, drive back to NYC, drop off folks, pick up groceries, collapse.

29 hour turnaround, total.

I'ze tired.

Massive amounts of email to unload and answer, work to edit, words to write, and trips to plan. Knowing I'll get it all under control isn't quite the same as having it all under control already.

*makes more coffee, adds it to the whiskey*
lagilman: coffee or die (Cas bitchface)
Because, well, because this episode really nailed me between the eyes, for several reasons. If you haven't seen "Meta Fiction" yet, feel free to avert your eyes....


Main thought:  Yep, yep, that’s kind of what it’s like when the characters toss your script and refuse to go along with the plot….and explaining to them that “but this is the plot! You need to follow the outline!” never seems to work…” But the experienced storyteller also knows that sometimes the plot twists, and the ending isn’t quite what you’d originally thought it would be.

Metatron spent a lot of time transcribing someone else’s words, and reading other peoples’ stories. As a writer, though, he’s a newbie. He hasn’t yet learned that you can’t always force the ending to stay the same form it was when you started….

Second thought: oh Gadreel, what was that look on your face, at the end? What is going on in your oh-so-conflicted and oh-so-damaged head?

Third thought: any Gabriel is better than no Gabriel, I suppose.

Fourth thought: that title was a terrible, terrible multi-layered pun, bless their pointy little heads.

Fifth thought… this one gets kinda long. And there are gifs.

So, yeah.  Overall high marks for Show a) kicking it up a notch in terms of Events, b) using every damn tool in their toolbox to kick it up, and c) not pulling many punches.

But there was one punch that, for me, was straight to the gut.

The look on Castiel’s face was the pullback to the blow: What have you done?

mark of cain revealed

Dean’s fine.  Everyone’s fine.  Right. And they part, each to do their bit to bring this to an end…

But when Castiel returns to his motel room, filled with the detritus of Being a Hunter (shades of John’s motel room in Season 1), the look on his face is of someone who is bleeding internally, who has taken the last blow before his knees buckle.  Because Metatron holds the script, and Dean wears the Mark of Cain.

“You are not the hero in this masterpiece. You are the villain. I’m the hero.”

If they are not the heroes, if they are not The Righteous Man and the Angel - then what chance to do they have?

And then the blow lands - the moment when Castiel stops, turns, and tears down the wall of evidence, clearing it away to make the glyph of the Horn of Gabriel and call his troops to him …

Cas-Tearing-Down-Evidence_zps1bbbf380

It was the sheer violence that I loved in this scene [where loved means “oh Casbabyno”], the “get the fuck out of my way you useless pieces of paper that can’t save anyone” intensity of his slow-building yet sudden decision.  That is not the rational strategist, the emotionless angel-soldier.  That’s a heart in pain

”Fine,” he is saying.  ”I will play your game.  I will embrace the role you have made for me, leading my people to death in a futile attempt to destroy you.  And we will see how it plays out…”

And oh, Cas, baby, you’re real close to becoming this 2014’s version of EndVerse Dean….

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Laura Anne Gilman

September 2018

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