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we deserve each other, you and I...
For my sins (and because I really do buy into the "pay forward" theory) I've volunteered* to work with the incoming non-member queries about how to [fill in the blank] with regard to publishing/writing.
Many of the queries run along the lines of "how do I become a successful writer?" Verbatim.
*is flummoxed*
ETA: oh, I know what to tell them. I just don't understand how anyone can come in cold, asking for An Answer presumably waiting to be handed over, and if it's arrogance ("it can't be THAT hard") or stupidity ("it can't be that hard?").
I can tell someone where to go for information on agents, and manuscript formatting, and how to tell a scam from a real deal, and what questions they should ask when offered representation/a contract. I know how to, delicately, tell someone that no, we aren't a publisher and can't help them spread the word about their 2000 page epic boy-and-squirrel romantic fantasy. I'm even -- because I was an Evil Editor and have no soul to speak of -- able to dash their hopes about joining SFWA before they've made their required professional sales, no matter how bestselling their book will be some day.
But the total hopeful haplessness of some of the questions....
Do other "arts" professions get this sort of thing? Do people walk up to actors and say "how do I get a movie deal?" Do they ask painter "How do I sell my painting for a million dollars?"
* in SFWA, "volunteered" means Mary Robinette Kowal says "will you...?" in a voice that means "you WILL."
Many of the queries run along the lines of "how do I become a successful writer?" Verbatim.
*is flummoxed*
ETA: oh, I know what to tell them. I just don't understand how anyone can come in cold, asking for An Answer presumably waiting to be handed over, and if it's arrogance ("it can't be THAT hard") or stupidity ("it can't be that hard?").
I can tell someone where to go for information on agents, and manuscript formatting, and how to tell a scam from a real deal, and what questions they should ask when offered representation/a contract. I know how to, delicately, tell someone that no, we aren't a publisher and can't help them spread the word about their 2000 page epic boy-and-squirrel romantic fantasy. I'm even -- because I was an Evil Editor and have no soul to speak of -- able to dash their hopes about joining SFWA before they've made their required professional sales, no matter how bestselling their book will be some day.
But the total hopeful haplessness of some of the questions....
Do other "arts" professions get this sort of thing? Do people walk up to actors and say "how do I get a movie deal?" Do they ask painter "How do I sell my painting for a million dollars?"
* in SFWA, "volunteered" means Mary Robinette Kowal says "will you...?" in a voice that means "you WILL."
Just be honest with them!
But I think the answer given by brownkitty is a good start. You could have a boilerplate email like that one ready to go out to people who are just asking casually, in general. It could help some of them realize that there's more to it than "inspiration and the pages pour out," as portrayed in so many movies and TV shows. My own mother has taken twenty years to accept that this isn't true: "If you were a REAL writer, you would just sit down one day Inspired and you'd type out the novel properly the first time around--just give it up, because if you have to go back through it and change things, you just aren't talented and you're wasting your time!" She could never accept that Paul McCartney wasn't born playing instruments and writing songs with no practice at all, either. It's tough for people to realize that this is hard work, and with fewer rewards than just about anything other than housework. (Housework not only goes unnoticed and is mocked, but can be undone in a second when the crew troops in from a hike with muddy feet, drops all the gear on the floor, and splays their filth all over the rooms you've just cleaned and tidied!)
Just let them know that usually, it's a thankless job. Only the lucky few even get into print, let alone make decent sales. They need to go elsewhere for money and prestige. Most people think it's a matter of just applying butt to chair and typing, but it's more than that (though that is step one.) Most people apparently believe that if you "can't get published," then you must be an illiterate prone to misspellings and comma splices, and that you don't have anything interesting to say. This is my pet peeve, as when people find out that I write, they immediately dig for "WHY HAVEN'T I HEARD OF YOU" and jump to "OH, YOU'RE JUST ONE OF THOSE STUPID ILLITERATES WHO CAN'T SPELL." That's why it's best not to let anyone know that you write, unless you LIKE being mocked and picked on.
If you tell them this . . . then the posers will fall away. The only ones left (albeit crushed-looking and pathetic) will be the ones who "have it." Not that this will get them anywhere, but at least they're not posers.
Re: Just be honest with them!
Re: Just be honest with them!